Didn’t Pass Your Stripe Test? Dealt a Blow of Disappointment? Ask These 3 Questions

As you set goals in martial arts, and work towards earning a black belt, you are destined to be met with failure. 

Welcome to achievement. 😅

It’s a game, there are rules, and sometimes you lose. Sometimes you don’t get what you want. 

Disappointment can sting, whether you’re a seasoned adult that’s been accomplishing goals for 40 years, or a 5 year old who didn’t pass a stripe test for your yellow belt. 

So the next time you are met with the discouragement of not getting what you want when you want it, start teaching yourself to ask these 3, powerful questions:

  1. What’s good about this?
  2. How does this serve or help me?
  3. What can I learn from this?

Our brains are pretty good at finding answers to the questions we ask ourselves—positive or negative. “Why am I such a nincompoop?” is going to get you precise answers that you may not like, while “What’s good about this?” has the potential to elevate your thinking and mood. 

Asking the 3 questions above will net you some good lessons and ideas, ones that are sure to propel you forward, rather than assisting you in wallowing in self pity. 

Teach these questions to your kids. Use them yourself. Get in the habit of brushing off disappointment with a dose of healthy questions like these, and others you create. 

It will take practice, and sometimes it might take you a day or two or week or two, but when you can finally calm down and direct your brain, take a breath. Pause. Ask the better questions, and create some answers that will inspire you to continue the journey. 

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